Waggle's AVC#4 in absentia
Beleive or not!
1) Sophmore year Waggle is excited to go to summer lax camp and show off his new visor that says "On my way to lax practice, bro". His excitement fades when he gets to camp and finds out all tobacco products are banned. He manages to to find a counseler who dips and ends up trading his testicles for a tin of Kodiak. He later regrets this descision when he finds he can no longer effectively sing along to his favorite Crash Test Dummies song.
2) Waggle meets his high school girlfriend when he gets on the short bus by mistake. Always a sucker for babes with Fetal Alchohol Syndrome, Waggle falls fastly in love. The relationship sadly comes to an end when during debate team practice, Waggle wactches his girlfriend lose to a bag of hammers. Waggle dumps his GF for the bag of hammers, to whom he also loses his virginity. His anal virginity (OUCH!)
3) While waiting on the cafeteria lunch line, Waggle tries to tell a funny story about his latest boating experience where his friend, Jonathon Anton, got in a fight with some denim-skirted pregnant rednecks at the Battle Creek picnic area. Instead of amusing, Waggle's story bores his friends so badly they all begin lighting themselves on fire. Waggle tries to save his rep by showing off naked pictures of Cindy Crawford which spent 30 hours searching for in AOL chatrooms.
4) Pissed about missing the Boyz II Men reunion tour when it came through the Calvert County Rec Center, Waggle takes his agression out at lax practice. He kills his first man when his titanium lacrosse stick accidentally goes through his goalie's brain. Waggle atteneds the wake not out of remorse but because the services include an open salad bar and omlette station.
1) Sophmore year Waggle is excited to go to summer lax camp and show off his new visor that says "On my way to lax practice, bro". His excitement fades when he gets to camp and finds out all tobacco products are banned. He manages to to find a counseler who dips and ends up trading his testicles for a tin of Kodiak. He later regrets this descision when he finds he can no longer effectively sing along to his favorite Crash Test Dummies song.
2) Waggle meets his high school girlfriend when he gets on the short bus by mistake. Always a sucker for babes with Fetal Alchohol Syndrome, Waggle falls fastly in love. The relationship sadly comes to an end when during debate team practice, Waggle wactches his girlfriend lose to a bag of hammers. Waggle dumps his GF for the bag of hammers, to whom he also loses his virginity. His anal virginity (OUCH!)
3) While waiting on the cafeteria lunch line, Waggle tries to tell a funny story about his latest boating experience where his friend, Jonathon Anton, got in a fight with some denim-skirted pregnant rednecks at the Battle Creek picnic area. Instead of amusing, Waggle's story bores his friends so badly they all begin lighting themselves on fire. Waggle tries to save his rep by showing off naked pictures of Cindy Crawford which spent 30 hours searching for in AOL chatrooms.
4) Pissed about missing the Boyz II Men reunion tour when it came through the Calvert County Rec Center, Waggle takes his agression out at lax practice. He kills his first man when his titanium lacrosse stick accidentally goes through his goalie's brain. Waggle atteneds the wake not out of remorse but because the services include an open salad bar and omlette station.
posted by Anonymous | 7:29 AM
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